Ball Five!

Remember when we were kids in late August and a bunch of us would decide to all go down to the park and play ball? We’d grab our bats and gloves, a helmet, maybe, a few balls and, with the best intentions, we’d grab an open diamond, pick teams and start playing. There was nothing like it. We couldn’t wait to hit, to make a great play or an amazing throw. We’d play a few innings or a couple of hours, running hard, throwing hard, swinging hard, trying hard… but then… maybe some girls we knew would walk by. Or maybe some other friends rode by on their bikes and they were on their way to do something else that sounded like fun. Sometimes, around late August, some guy would have a football and that would do the trick. By August, most of my friends were done with baseball and ready to move onto the ol’ pigskin. Or maybe they just got bored. But whatever it was that caused my friends to lose interest, (I never lost interest when I was playing baseball. Not once) they lost interest. The game was played with less and less intensity and purpose. A few of us wished the game would end soon. Guys would start leaving. For all intents and purposes the game was over. Baseball was over for us until next February.

Hmmm… what can I be getting at with that story? Yes, my friends. The Dodgers have simply lost interest. They play with no focus, no desire, no intensity. They just want the season to end, and for them, it already has. Maybe Matt Kemp wants to play hoops or a little football. (If he plays receiver, keep him out of that sun field) Maybe Nomar wants to hang with his newborn and his ex-soccer wifey. By virtue of his performance tonight, Jeff Kent may have already retired. Loney just looks tired. His bat is slow and it’s too much trouble for him to go up there and not swing at everything. Go to sleep, James. …James? James? Oh, he’s already asleep. Russell’s lost what little power he has and is getting lazy behind the plate. Casey Blake has already gone back to Iowa. Ethier is too ethereal after winning the starting job following one good week. Manny is simply playing out the last 5 weeks with a smile on his face. Doesn’t care what happens. Won’t be a Dodger next year. Broxton is tired of throwing balls in the strike zone. Park is tired. Even Billingsley has lost a yard off his fastball. And what about Joe Torre? Last night Andre Ethier earned a walk on 5 BALLS!!!! As I watched the game and watched ball 4 go by and didn’t see the ump signal a walk, I don’t know, call me crazy, but I sort of expected to see the Dodger manager come out of the dugout and argue. Everyone in the stadium knew it was ball 4, including Steiner and Lyons and everyone at Fox Prime Ticket. Okay, so he walked anyway, but don’t you even care, Joe? Don’t you care enough to come out of the dugout and tell the ump how many balls and strikes there are in the count and that your hitter should be awarded first base? Or were you not paying attention either? In either case, you come out looking BAD.

The Phillies? Well, thank god for the mediocre, milquetoast Dodgers. Ya lose 4 in a row to them at the Ravine, ya get ‘em all back at the Bank. The Phillies are a much different team than the Blue. They play with intensity, drive, and a sense of vengeance. Playoffs or not this year, they’re a winner. The Dodgers play with nothing. This 4 game sweep of the Dodgers by Philadelphia is the worst performance from a Dodger team I’ve seen since 1993. They were horrendous. Jeff Kent's performance tonight at the plate could be one of the 5 worst performances I've ever seen from a Dodger 3 hole hitter. Maybe he's just trying to prove he's not getting better because he's hitting in front of Manny. But let’s look at the team realistically one more time: The Phillies, in Utley, Burrell and Howard, have 3 guys with 95 home runs. Between Kemp, Ethier, Loney, Martin and Kent, there are a grand total of 64 home runs. That’s right. 64. Jeff Kent, your number 3 hitter in front of Manny has… here it is… 11 home runs. His home runs go to 11. That’s it. 11. As I’ve said time and time again, you can’t win without impact players and Manny is the only impact player on the team. Who wants to argue Matt Kemp is an impact player? Come on, I know that’s what a lot of you are thinking, so who wants to argue? Matt Kemp is NOT an impact player. He has 15 measly home runs on August 26th. He has fewer than 70 RBI’s on August 26th. He leads the team in strikeouts and has blown game after game with stupid mistake. A good player? Perhaps. An impact player? No way. Not yet. Russell Martin? Please. He’s a singles hitter with poor plate discipline who can’t control his emotions in tight situations, and is very middle of the road, if not weak, defensively. You see, Dodger fans, late August and September are when teams tell us who they are, both on an individual basis and as a team. This is who the Dodgers are. About a game below .500, no heart, no focus, no discipline, no speed, lots of DP’s, little power, inconsistent starting pitching with a mediocre bullpen and no closer and a manager who’s the nicest guy in the world but who doesn’t challenge the team at all. Ball Five.

By the way, not only do we have to endure the torture of watching the Dodgers "play" and I use that term loosely, we have to endure the virtual waterboarding that is Charlie Steiner. Charlie Steiner let another oral bowel movement out tonight. Phils 3rd baseman, Jose Feliz came up and Steiner said, "Feliz Navidad!" That's great, Charlie. Keep 'em coming, you idiot. Meanwhile, Steve Lyons, keep drawing those diagrams that explain AND EXCUSE why the Dodgers swung and missed at the latest bad pitch. Gimme a break, already.

You miss the Dodger way of playing ball? You miss the old Dodgers? Hustle, discipline, focus, swagger, pitching, defense, timely hitting? Go down the 5 freeway to a place called Anaheim. It’s worth the drive and guess what? They’re on TV too. Am I a front runner? No, just bored.